Tuesday, November 25, 2014

LIFE - Live In Friendship Everyday

"I sure wished I had her body." She has good genetics, so it's not that hard for her." Yeah, I'd look like that too if I had hours to workout." "Man, I'd kill to have a six-pack like that!" "Who does she think she is anyways?" "She must not be very smart cause she spends so much time working on her body." 

That folks is reality. We have all said phrases like this at some point. We are human. We have emotions and feelings which include jealousy and envy.  These are not the best qualities but they do rear their ugly head now and then.  We'd like to think we are better than these comments. We'd like to believe we don't actually feel this way. Even if we don't say these comments aloud, we may still think them from time to time.  It's human nature and we have all been guilty of it at one time or another.

It's YOUR reaction to it that makes the difference. It doesn't matter if you never actually mouthed the words to another person because you thought it,  which means others do too.  I'm guilty of it just like everyone else. So what do you do? How do you change the behavior or thought process? Should you change it? After all, you are entitled to your opinion and in fact, you have freedom of speech - right? 

So what is wrong with it? Women bullying other women based on their appearance is no different than men making degrading comments to or about females.  But there is a difference in a manner of speaking. Women are viewed as the weaker sex. You can deny it but society as a whole makes this generalization. Doesn't matter if you are talking about brains, muscle, business, politics, etc. So why do we as females who carry so many commonalities continue to battle against one another in a covert manner? Why can't we be a support system for one another rather than a battleground?

Is it because we are insecure? Afraid? Jealous? Low self-esteem? It can be a combination of all these things or even as simple as we are just crabby and need to feel better about something so why not tear someone else down. Yes, people are going to have conflicts. That is normal. It is even normal to be 'catty' but that doesn't make it right. It breeds negativity within ourselves and gets passed around a common cold. 

So how do you fix it? Do you need to fix it? Why? You are in control of how you react. It is your choice. You are not better because you make more money, wear designer clothes, live in the right neighborhood, graduated from 'the' school, are thinner, have better skin or prettier hair.  You can be better because you are a kind and giving person.  When you pay someone a compliment, don't you feel better rather than making a negative comment? Constructive criticism or advice is more beneficial than belittling or being condescending to another.  The positive chain-reaction needs to begin somewhere, so why not with you?

It is always easy? Absolutely not. It's called LIFE. It has it's ups and downs and everyone is fighting their own battles. Some battles are won and others are not. Sometimes, its a war just beginning and each battle won is a small victory in the right direction.

Take a step back. Be grateful for the gifts you have been given. Work hard for the fruits that await you in the future. Be thankful for those around you that accept you for who you are despite your flaws. Remember, take the time to fight your battles with all your might but don't leave a man behind. Extend your friendship and you could be the one shoulder that they have been waiting for all this time.  L I F E - Live In Friendship Everyday